7 Things These Women Would Do Differently While Raising Their Daughter

We talk often about mother daughter relationship in general. What we miss is how the times have changed and with it, change the rules of parenting.

We talked to a few young girls about what they will do differently when they are mothers and this is what we got:

1. Learn to respect your gender:

“Gossip is what’s destroying us. Women sit together and do a complete postmortem of other girls or women, totally forgetting about the fact that that person is someone’s mother, daughter or a sister. It’s ironic how we’re so against men discussing and objectifying us but we do it ourselves. So, I will teach my daughter to respect all women. Respect their choices. Respect their character. Respect their opinion. We always talk about teaching our boys to respect women but our daughters should be taught the same. Men will not spare us if we don’t have each other’s back. That’s what I would like to see in my daughter.” (Zimmel Hussain) 

2. Speak up when you see bad things happening 

“I’ve constantly noticed that my generation has become insensitive towards others and we’ve become a hell lot of self-centered. I’ve heard girls in India getting raped in the middle of a street in broad daylight and nobody was there to help her and that’s where it hit me. It’s about time that we teach our daughters to speak up for others and for themselves without any kind of fear. Our daughters should not know to keep quiet on injustice. The next generation should be better than their parents!” (Kalsoom Khan)   

3. Be comfortable in her own skin: 

“I would teach her to be comfortable in her own skin, her own body and colour. Being in my family I have always had the misfortune of being compared to my own sister. The sister I love more than life itself. ‘Yeh ziada gori hai’, ‘Is pe ziada acha lag raha hai’ or ‘Baji (my mom) ap jaise patlay features nai hain inkay’. Doing this you’re turning your children AGAINST each other and yourself. You’re making them compete with each other.  Please DO NOT do this to them. Teach them to be each other’s strength.”(Zainab Bukhari)

4. Don’t tolerate things or people you should not: 

“I’m pretty straight forward and I never take anyone’s BS and even though this bothers some people, it made my life a hell lot easier. I would teach my daughter the same thing. I will always tell her to do everything that she likes and meet people she loves! Get rid of people and things that make you upset and.” (Zainab Farooq)

 5. Give her the freedom she should have so she doesn’t have to lie: 

“I’ve seen people of my age lying to their parents on so many little things just because they felt uncomfortable sitting them and having a real conversation about it and simply lying about it seemed like a much better way of getting things done. When you do things secretly, that thing loses its value no matter how noble of an act it was. I will always always encourage my daughter to come up to me and ask me to my face if she can go out with her friends rather than she sneaking out of college without me getting notified.”(Khadija Waheed) 

6. She will be allowed to follow her dreams: 

“I will not raise like those girls who will be afraid to travel alone or hold herself back from anything just because she is a girl. She will be confident enough to follow her dreams. You want to be a footballer? Be a footballer and be an awesome one. Her mother will always support her for her decisions and will play a major role in fulfilling her dreams.”(Anoushay Batool) 

 7. Our mother daughter relationship will be stronger even when she messes up 

“I will be her friend and share a lot of my experiences and struggles with her like most friends do so that she is comfortable enough to come up to me and share her problems with me. I will always listen to her, even when she is wrong. Apart from all the good thing that I’ll be teaching her of course, I would want her to know that even if she kills a person, she should know that her mother will help her dump the body. I would never want her to keep things from me because she got scared that I would get mad at her.”(Laiba Noor) 

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